The Cabbage

I am your electric roaster; your anti-social coaster.

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Terminology

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FAQ - List of Terms

fuckyeahlgbt:

Please keep in mind that this list is rudimentary, and that what comes with language is its ability to adapt, mutate and change.  Terms are presented to you for the purpose of communication, and this list should hardly be considered an authoritative source.

ACE: shortened version of and slang term for Asexual, and slang term for Aromantic.

AG/AGGRESIVE: See ‘Stud.’

AGENDERED: Person is internally ungendered.

ALLY: A person who confronts heterosexism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, heterosexual privilege, and so on, in themselves and others out of self-interest and a concern for the well-being of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and other queer-related people, and who believes that heterosexism is a social injustice.

ANDROGYNE: A person with traits ascribed to males and females. Androgyny may be physical, presentational, or some combination.

AROMANTIC: (orientation) a- meaning non; the lack of romantic attraction, and one identifying with this orientation.

ASEXUALITY: A sexual orientation generally characterized by not feeling sexual attraction or a desire for partnered sexuality. Asexuality is distinct from celibacy, which is the deliberate abstention from sexual activity. Some asexuals do have sex. There are many diverse ways of being asexual. You can learn more about asexuality here

BEAR - The most common definition of a ‘bear’ is a man who has facial/body hair, and a cuddly body. However, the word ‘bear’ means many things to different people, even within the bear movement. Many men who do not have one or all of these characteristics define themselves as bears, making the term a very loose one. ‘Bear’ is often defined as more of an attitude and a sense of comfort with natural masculinity and bodies.

BERDACHE: A generic term used to refer to a third gender person (woman-livingman). The term ‘berdache’ is generally rejected as inappropriate and offensive by Native Peoples because it is a term that was assigned by European settlers to differently gendered Native Peoples. Appropriate terms vary by tribe and include: ‘one-spirit’, ‘two-spirit’, and ‘wintke.’

BICURIOUS: A curiosity about having sexual relations with a same gender/sex person.

BIGENDERED: Having two genders; exhibiting cultural characteristics of male and female roles.

BIPHOBIA: Fear or hatred of people who are bisexual, pansexual, omnisexual, or nonmonosexual. Biphobia is closely linked with transphobia and homophobia.

BIROMANTIC: the romantic attraction to both male/men and female/women, and one identifying with this orientation.

BISEXUAL: A person whose primary sexual and affectional orientation is toward people of the same and other genders, or towards people regardless of their gender. You can learn more about bisexuality here

BOI: also known as a ‘soft butch’. Not necessarily less of a butch, it is just a completely different attitude/style. Boi’s are more of the ‘new-age’ butch. There is a different type of swagger and style than Butch. Also used as a term of affection from a Femme.

BUTCH: A person who identifies themselves as masculine, whether it be physically, mentally or emotionally. ‘Butch’ is sometimes used as a derogatory term for lesbians, but it can also be claimed as an affirmative identity label.

CISGENDER/CISSEXUAL/CISSEX: A gender identity that society considers to “match” the biological sex assigned at birth. The prefix cis- means “on this side of” or “not across from.” A term used to call attention to the privilege of people who are not transgendered.

COMING OUT: Describes voluntarily making public one’s sexual behaviors, or sexual or gender identity. Related terms include: “being out,” which means not concealing one’s sexual behaviors or preference or gender identity, and “outing,” a term used for making public the sexual behaviors or preference or gender identity of another who would prefer to keep this information secret.

CLOSETED: Refers to a homosexual, bisexual, transperson or intersex person who will not or cannot disclose their sex, sexuality, sexual orientation or gender identity to their friends, family, co-workers, or society. An intersex person may be closeted due to ignorance about their status since standard medical practice is to “correct,” whenever possible, intersex conditions early in childhood and to hide the medical history from the patient. There are varying degrees of being “in the closet”; for example, a person can be out in their social life, but in the closet at work, or with their family. Also known as ‘Downlow” or ‘D/L.’

CROSSDRESSER (CD): The most neutral word to describe a person who dresses, at least partially or part of the time, and for any number of reasons, in clothing associated with another gender within a particular society. Carries no implications of “usual” gender appearance, or sexual orientation. Has replaced “transvestite,” which is outdated, problematic, and generally offensive, since it was historically used to diagnose medical/mental health disorders.

DEMISEXUAL: Someone who is experiencing a level between sexuality and asexuality. The person does not experience sexual attraction to people based on appearance but rather on their level of intimate connection with the person.

DRAG: The performance of one or multiple genders theatrically.

DRAG KING: A woman who appears as a man on a temporary basis; she may or may not have any masculine expression in her usual life. Generally in reference to an act or performance. 

DRAG QUEEN: A man who appears as a woman on a temporary basis; he may or may not have any feminine expression in his usual life. Generally in reference to an act or performance. 

DYKE: Derogatory term referring to a masculine lesbian. Sometimes adopted affirmatively by lesbians (not necessarily masculine ones) to refer to themselves.

DYADIC: not being Intersex, mostly used by people who are Intersex.

E/EM: see Ey/Em; referring to one who is of undisclosed or non-binary gender.

EY/EM: see E/Em; referring to one who is of undisclosed or non-binary gender.

FAG: Derogatory term referring to someone perceived as non-heteronormative.

FAG HAG: A term primarily used to describe women who prefer the social company of gay men. While this term is claimed in an affirmative manner by some, it is largely regarded as derogatory.

FEMME – Feminine identified person of any gender/sex.

FTM (F2M): Female-to-male transsexual or transgender person. Someone assigned female at birth who identifies on the male spectrum.

GAY: A person (or adjective to describe a person) whose primary sexual and affectional orientation is toward people of the same gender; a commonly-used word for male homosexuals.

GENDER: A social construct used to classify a person as a man, woman, or some other identity. Fundamentally different from the sex one is assigned at birth.

GENDER BINARY: The idea that there are only two genders – male/female or man/woman and that a person must be strictly gendered as either/or. (See also ‘Identity Sphere.’)

GENDER EXPRESSION/PRESENTATION: How one expresses oneself, in terms of dress and/or behaviors that society characterizes as “masculine” or “feminine.” May also be androgynous or something else altogether.  Some people differentiate between the two terms.

GENDERFLUID: Being fluid in motion between two or more genders; shifting naturally in gender identity and/or gender expression/presentation. May be a gender identity itself. Refers to the fluidity of identity.

GENDERFUCK: A form of gender identity or expression, genderfuck is an intentional attempt to present a confusing gender identity that contributes to dismantling the perception of a gender binary.

GENDER IDENTITY: A person’s internal sense or self-conceptualization of their own gender. Used to call attention to the self-identification inherent in gender. Cisgender, transgender, man, woman, genderqueer, etc. are all gender identities.

GENDERISM: The belief that there are, and should be, only two genders and that one’s gender or most aspects of it are inevitably tied to the assigned sex.

GENDER NON-CONFORMING (GNC): A person who does not subscribe to gender expressions or roles expected of them by society.

GENDER OUTLAW: A person who refuses to be defined by conventional definitions of men and women. A term popularized by Kate Bornstein in her book of the same name.

GENDERQUEER: A person whose gender identity and/or gender expression falls outside of the dominant societal norm for their assigned sex, is beyond genders, or is some combination thereof.

GENDER VARIANT: A person whose gender identity and/or gender expression varies from the culturally-expected characteristics of their assigned sex. 

HATE CRIME: Hate Crime legislation often defines a hate crime as a crime motivated by the actual or perceived race, color, religion, national origin, ethnicity, gender, disability, or sexual orientation of any person.

HETERONORMATIVITY: The assumption, in individuals or in institutions, that everyone is heterosexual, and that heterosexuality is superior to homosexuality and bisexuality.

HETEROROMANIC: a romantic attraction to the other sex/gender, and one identifying with this orientation. Typically female/women attracted to male/men, and vice versa.

HETEROSEXISM: The assumption that all people are or should be heterosexual. Heterosexism excludes the needs, concerns, and life experiences of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and other non-monosexual people as well as asexual, transgender, and intersex people, while it gives advantages to heterosexual people.  It is often a subtle form of oppression which reinforces realities of silence and invisibility.

HETEROSEXUALITY: A sexual orientation in which a person feels physically and emotionally attracted to people of the “opposite” gender. 

HETEROSEXUAL PRIVILEGE: Those benefits derived automatically by being heterosexual that are denied to homosexuals and bisexuals. Also, the benefits homosexuals and bisexuals receive as a result of claiming heterosexual identity or denying homosexual or bisexual identity.

HOMOPHOBIA: The irrational hatred and fear of homosexuals or homosexuality.  In a broader sense, any disapproval of homosexuality at all, regardless of motive.  Homophobia includes prejudice, discrimination, harassment, and acts of violence brought on by fear and hatred.  It occurs on personal, institutional, and societal levels, and is closely linked with transphobia, biphobia, and others.

HOMOROMANTIC: the romantic attraction to the same sex/gender, and one identifying with this orientation. Female/women romantically attracted to female/women, and male/men romantically attracted to male/men.

HOMOSEXUALITY: A sexual orientation in which a person feels physically and emotionally attracted to people of the same gender. This term originated within the psychiatric community to label people with a mental illness, and still appears within the current discourse, but is generally thought to be outdated.

INTERNALIZED HOMOPHOBIA: The fear and self-hate of one’s own homosexuality or non-monosexuality that occurs for many individuals who have learned negative ideas about homosexuality throughout childhood.  One form of internalized oppression is the acceptance of the myths and stereotypes applied to the oppressed group. 

INTERGENDER: A person whose gender identity is between genders or a combination of genders.

INTERSEX: People who naturally (that is, without any medical interventions) develop primary and/or secondary sex characteristics that do not fit neatly into society’s definitions of male or female. Many visibly intersex babis/children are surgically altered by doctors to make their sex characteristics conform to societal binary norm expectations. Intersex people are relatively common, although society’s denial of their existence has allowed very little room for intersex issues to be discussed publicly. Has replaced “hermaphrodite,” which is inaccurate, outdated, problematic, and generally offensive, since it means “having both sexes” and this is not necessarily true, as there are at least 16 different ways to be intersex. You can learn more about intersexuality here

LAMDA: the Gay Activist Alliance originally chose the Lambda, the Greek letter ‘L’, as a symbol in 1970. Organizers chose the letter to signify liberation.

LESBIAN: A woman whose primary sexual and affectional orientation is toward people of the same gender.

LGBT: Abbreviation for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender.  An umbrella term that is used to refer to the community as a whole. There are other variations of this which mix up the letters (GLBT) or are more inclusive such as adding ‘queer’, ‘intersex’ or ‘asexual/ally’ in LGBTQIAA.

LIPSTICK LESBIAN: Usually refers to a lesbian with a feminine gender expression. Can be used in a positive or a derogatory way, depending on who is using it. Is sometimes also used to refer to a lesbian who is seen as automatically passing for heterosexual.

METROSEXUAL: First used in 1994 by British journalist Mark Simpson, who coined the term to refer to an urban, heterosexual male with a strong aesthetic sense who spends a great deal of time and money on his appearance and lifestyle. This term can be perceived as derogatory because it reinforces stereotypes that all gay men are fashion-conscious and materialistic.

MTF (M2F): Male-to-female transsexual or transgender person. Someone assigned male at birth who identifies on the female spectrum.

NON-MONOSEXUAL: People who have romantic, sexual, or affectional desire for more than one gender. Bisexuality is the most well-known form of non-monosexuality.

OMNIGENDERED: Possessing all genders; exhibiting cultural characteristics of male and female. The term is specifically used to refute the concept of only two genders. 

PACKING: Wearing a phallic device on the groin and under clothing for any purposes including: (for someone without a biological penis) the validation or confirmation of one’s masculine gender identity; seduction; and/or sexual readiness (for one who likes to penetrate another during sexual intercourse).

PAN: shortened version of and slang term for Pansexual/Panromantic.

PANGENDERED: A person whose gender identity is comprised of all or many gender expressions.

PANROMANTIC: the romantic attraction to all sexes/genders, and one identifying with this orientation.

PANSEXUAL, OMNISEXUAL: Terms used to describe people who have romantic, sexual, or affectional desire for people of all genders and sexes.  Used by many in place of “bisexual,” which implies that only two sexes or genders exist.

PASSING: Describes a person’s ability to be accepted as their preferred gender/sex or race/ethnic identity or to be seen as heterosexual.

POLYAMOROUS: the desire or need to have multiple relationships or multiple people in a relationship.

POLYGENDERED, PANGENDERED: Exhibiting characteristics of multiple genders; deliberately refuting the concept of only two genders.

POLYROMANTIC: poly-meaning many; see also Spectraromantic; the sexual attraction to various sexes/genders, and one identifying with this orientation.

POMOSEXUAL: a neologism used to describe a person who avoids sexual orientation labels such as heterosexual and homosexual. It is not to be confused with asexuality, which is a sexual orientation used to describe an individual who does not experience sexual attraction.

OUTING: Involuntary disclosure of one’s sexual orientation, gender identity, or intersex status.

QUEER: Anyone who chooses to identify as such. This can include, but is not limited to, gays, lesbians, bisexuals, transgendered people, intersex people, asexual people, allies, leather fetishists, freaks, etc. Not all the people in the above subcategories I.D. as queer, and many people NOT in the above groups DO.   This term has different meanings to different people.  Some still find it offensive, while others reclaim it to encompass the broader sense of history of the gay rights movement. Can also be used as an umbrella term like LGBT, as in “the queer community.”

SAME GENDER LOVING: A term used by some African-American people who love, date, and/or have attraction to people of the same gender.  Often used by those who prefer to distance themselves from the terms they see as associated with the “White-dominated” queer communities.

SEX: A categorization based on the appearance of genitalia at birth. Refers to the biological characteristics chosen to assign humans as male, female, or intersex.

SEXUALITY:  The components of a person that include their biological sex, sexual orientation, gender identity, sexual practices, etc.

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: an enduring emotional, romantic, sexual, and/or affectional attraction.  Terms include homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual, pansexual, non-monosexual, queer, and asexual, and may apply to varying degrees. Sexual orientation is fluid, and people use a variety of labels to describe their own.  Sometimes sexual preference is used but can be problematic as it implies choice.

SEXUAL REASSIGNMENT SURGERY (SRS): A term used by some medical professionals to refer to a group of surgical options that alter a person’s “sex”. In most states, one or multiple surgeries are required to achieve legal recognition of gender variance.

STRAIGHT: A person (or adjective to describe a person) whose primary sexual and affectional orientation is toward people of the “opposite” gender.

STRAIGHT-ACTING: A term usually applied to gay men who readily pass as heterosexual. The term implies that there is a certain way that gay men should act that is significantly different from heterosexual men. Straight-acting gay men are often looked down upon in the LGBTQ community for seemingly accessing heterosexual privilege.

STEALTH: This term refers to when a person chooses to be secretive in the public sphere about their gender history, either after transitioning or while successful passing. (Also referred to as ‘going stealth’ or ‘living in stealth mode’.)

STUD: An African-American and/or Latina masculine lesbian. Also known as ‘butch’ or ‘aggressive’.

TRANSFAG: A trans male-identified person who is attracted to/loves other male-identified people.  

TRANSGENDER: Used most often as an umbrella term, and frequently abbreviated to “trans” or “trans*” (the asterisk indicates the option to fill in the appropriate label, ie. Transman). It describes a wide range of identities and experiences of people whose gender identity and/or expression differs from conventional expectations based on their assigned biological birth sex. Some commonly held definitions:
  1. Someone whose behavior or expression does not “match” their assigned sex according to society.
  2. A gender outside of the man/woman binary.
  3. Having no gender or multiple genders.
  4. Some definitions also include people who perform gender or play with it.
  5. Historically, the term was coined to designate a transperson who was not undergoing medical transition (surgery or hormones).

For more on what the term transgender can umbrella, click here.

TRANSITION: An individualized process by which transsexual and transgender people ‘switch’ from one gender presentation to another. There are three general aspects to transitioning: social (i.e. name, pronouns, interactions, etc.), medical (i.e. hormones, surgery, etc.), and legal (i.e. gender marker and name change, etc.). A trans* individual may transition in any combination, or none, of these aspects.

TRANSSEXUAL (TS):  A person who perceives themselves as a member of a gender that does not “match” the sex they were assigned at birth. Many pursue hormones and/or surgery. Sometimes used to specifically refer to trans* people pursuing gender or sex reassignment.

TRANSMAN: Also referred to as FTM.

TRANSPHOBIA: A reaction of fear, loathing, and discriminatory treatment of people whose identity or gender presentation (or perceived gender or gender identity) does not “match,” in the societally accepted way, the sex they were assigned at birth. Transgendered people, intersex people, lesbians, gay men, bisexuals, and other non-monosexuals are typically the target of transphobia.

TRANSWOMAN: Also referred to as MTF.

TRIANGLE: A symbol of remembrance. Gay men in the Nazi concentration camps were forced to wear the pink triangle as a designation of being homosexual. Women who did not conform to social roles, often believed to be lesbians, had to wear the black triangle.  The triangles are worn today as symbols of freedom, reminding us to never forget.

TRYKE: A trans female-identified person who is attracted to/loves other female-identified people.

TWEENER: also referred to as a ‘softball lesbian’, not femme and not boi or butch

TWINK: gay male version of ‘Tweener’

TWO SPIRIT: These terms describe indigenous people who fulfill one of many mixed gender roles found traditionally among many Native Americans and Canadian First Nations indigenous groups. These roles included wearing the clothing and performing the work that is traditional for both men and women. Dual-gendered, or “two-spirited,” people are viewed differently in different Native communities.  Sometimes they are seen without stigma and are considered emissaries from the creator, treated with deference and respect, or even considered sacred, but other times this is not the case. “Two-spirit” is the closest thing to an appropriate umbrella term in referring to these gender traditions among Native peoples.  However, even “two-spirit” is contested in modern usage.

WOMYN: Some people spell the word with a “y” as a form of empowerment to move away from the word “men” contained in the “traditional” spelling of women.

ZE/HIR: Alternate pronouns that are gender neutral and preferred by some gender variant persons. Pronounced /zee/ and /here,/ they replace “he”/”she” and “his”/”hers” respectively.

Sources: 

http://lgbtcenter.ucdavis.edu/lgbt-education/lgbtqia-glossary

http://projectqueer.tumblr.com/lgbtqterminology

http://transgayinfo.tumblr.com/post/2766555592/queertionary-2-0

http://lgbtqadvice.tumblr.com/terms

secondlina:

A comic about the different types of attraction one might feel. I saw these descriptions floating around on tumblr and felt compelled to add visuals. They are from a website about asexuality. Although, I think people who are not asexual feel these regularly too. There’s all kinds of attractions for all kinds of people. Enjoy.

secondlina:

A comic about the different types of attraction one might feel. I saw these descriptions floating around on tumblr and felt compelled to add visuals. They are from a website about asexuality. Although, I think people who are not asexual feel these regularly too. There’s all kinds of attractions for all kinds of people. Enjoy.

fennekin-the-fox:

wow i actually didn’t really think this existed for a bit but was too scared to look it up to find out if it didn’t… it’s kinda ridiculous really i feel like i of all people should know this… there’s this kinda weird relief… i’m not sure if it’s perfect but it really like really well fits
*whispers* maybe it’s not flawless because *nicki minaj voice* i am not a word. i am not a line. i am not a girl that could ever be defined. i am not fly. i am levitation.

fennekin-the-fox:

wow i actually didn’t really think this existed for a bit but was too scared to look it up to find out if it didn’t… it’s kinda ridiculous really i feel like i of all people should know this… there’s this kinda weird relief… i’m not sure if it’s perfect but it really like really well fits

*whispers* maybe it’s not flawless because *nicki minaj voice* i am not a word. i am not a line. i am not a girl that could ever be defined. i am not fly. i am levitation.

Can anyone explain to me in detail about demiromanticism?

queenieofaces:

ineffableamoeba:

It would be greatly appreciated. I’m quite confused.

My ask is open to you all.

Sure!  Let’s try this thing.  I’m reblogging rather than dropping you an ask, though, ‘cause I don’t think I could explain in detail in the tiny ask box.

I can’t speak for all demiromantics, of course, but I can explain how it works for me, at the very least.

Necessary background information: I’m demiromantic and biromantic, although I haven’t figured out a way to combine those two words without it looking like a keyboard smash.  I’m also asexual.

Also, this answer is massive, so I’m hiding it under a cut.

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In defense of demiromanticism

queenieofaces:

This post has been cross-posted to The Asexual Agenda.

So it appears that Some People have decided to start going after demiromantics.*  Can’t say I’m deeply surprised, as it seems like Some People have nothing better to do than talk about how other people’s identities are invalid.  Metapianycist and greenchestnuts have already written in defense of demiromanticism, but as I identify as demiromantic, I thought I would weigh in as well.  (Oh gosh, what are you getting yourself into, Queenie?)

Read More

In defense of demiromanticism

queenieofaces:

This post has been cross-posted to The Asexual Agenda.

So it appears that Some People have decided to start going after demiromantics.*  Can’t say I’m deeply surprised, as it seems like Some People have nothing better to do than talk about how other people’s identities are invalid.  Metapianycist and greenchestnuts have already written in defense of demiromanticism, but as I identify as demiromantic, I thought I would weigh in as well.  (Oh gosh, what are you getting yourself into, Queenie?)

Read More

Alloromantics vs. aromantics: the great divide

queenieofaces:

This post has been cross-posted to The Asexual Agenda.

I want to take a moment to talk about the perceived divide between alloromantic* aces and aromantic aces.  You’ve probably seen it in those “oh man, asexual people actually exist” articles; there will be a line that says something like, “Asexual people, like sexual people, can fall in love, date, and marry!”  Maybe there’s then a line suggesting that aromantic people exist too, or maybe they aren’t mentioned at all.  Or maybe you’ve seen one of the blog posts about how asexual people are just like allosexual people, but without the sexual attraction!  …except for aromantics; we don’t know what their deal is.  Or maybe you were reading about how asexual people can have romantic relationships—unless they’re aromantic, in which case they get to have queerplatonic relationships instead.  Or maybe you’ve seen one of those arguments about whether or not asexuals are queer, and nobody’s really sure what to do with the aromantics, so they sort of shove them in the corner and ignore them.  Or maybe you’ve seen the queer_fest prompts, a number of which ask for a character to be “asexual, not aromantic,” implying that aromantic is the default for asexual people and that “not aromantic” means “alloromantic,” since often the prompts are asking for what’s clearly intended to be a romantic pairing.

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Feb 3. Day 7

A cliche concept

Gender - 
How strange is it that we can completely change how we are perceived in this world just by messing with the construct of gender via makeup?

(Source: holly-harford, via cupofsugarplease)


The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920)

The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920)

(Source: vintagegal, via strangedayshavefoundme666)

MISANTHROPE - Issue #1

truetrans666:

reinventingaxlrose:

in case anyone wanted to see Laura Jane Grace’s zine that she and George Stroumboulopoulos talked about during their interview, here it is.

Issue 7 can be found here

(via glitterpissed)

strangedayshavefoundme666:

Most famous image ever taken of a Canadian prime minister. Not joking. Look at him. Look at how pleased with himself he is. Smug bastard.

strangedayshavefoundme666:

Most famous image ever taken of a Canadian prime minister. Not joking. Look at him. Look at how pleased with himself he is. Smug bastard.

occultz:

this piercing……………………………………………………..

occultz:

this piercing……………………………………………………..

(Source: grodyhoe, via razeeedays)

gnarly-bruhh:

Every time i go to the outer banks i must take a picture of this house

gnarly-bruhh:

Every time i go to the outer banks i must take a picture of this house

(via leviathann)